15th June

Been to the Queen Elizabeth today for hubby's chemo. Thought we would be clever and go by train as I hate driving on the motorway and there is a train station just by the hospital. Got there fine with 1/2 to spare and booked in. "there's a bit of a hold up - where do you live?", when we replied that we were an hour and 15 mins away by train it was suggested that we go and have an early lunch and that she would phone us on the mobile.

Went down to the restaurant but there was no signal, so we went to the coffee shop. £3 for the most disgusting sandwich I have ever, ever had! (even worse than those the eldest child makes). Hadn't heard anything, so went back to the waiting room. Just as I was waiting to tell the nurse we were back hubby was shouted through - only to be weighed.

So we sat and we waited, and waited and waited. After 1 1/2 hours, I went through to check that he hadn't been forgotten - "we are waiting for pharmacy". Another hour later and he was finally called through.

I know that hubby was having a drip for an hour, but why is there only 1 comfy chair when I was also going to be sat there for an hour? He was a big brave boy - the needle was only small but once again the male mind came to play and it turned into the most massive needle that he'd ever seen.

He was first given anti-sickness medication and then a steroid to keep his energy levels up. Apparently hes going to be bouncing later - "he'll be wanting to do the garden, wash clothes, wash dishes". Never in a million years; he might say that he could do, but he would leave it at that, no matter how pumped up of laughing drugs he has had.

Then the chemo. It went a lot quicker that they said - before we knew it she was talking us through the drugs he had to take home -

• one anti sickness drug to be taken as close to 12 hours after this treatment as possible
• another anti sickness drug
• a steroid that has to be taken with food and not to be taken after 5pm as it will make him hyper later into the night

hes going to have a very down day after the 3 days of steroids as his body reacts to not having them anymore - god help me!

4th June

Youngest woke up at 5.30 and decided that the whole house should be up as well as it was his birthday - trying to get him back to bed was as successful as the England football team!

Hubby had to have his kidney function test today in readiness for the chemo. The hospital called yesterday and offered an appointment today. Had to drop him off at 10am then I went to work for a few hours - there was no way that I was going to sit and watch him moan about the amount of blood they were taking from him. I met him at 2 and he still had two more tests to do. They have injected some radioactive 'stuff' in one arm and then taken bloods at hour intervals from his other arm. And I was right (as always) if you listen to him then they have taken pints off him, all the hair on his arm has been ripped off from the tape and the list goes on.... How men manage to get through a day is one of the wonders of the world.

Youngest had a good day - lots of presents but I did feel sorry for him as the eldest had training so he had to spend his birthday at the cricket club (as usual in the summer).

2nd June

travelled down to the appointment. I was worrying about the motorways so made hubby leave far to early - but it was a good job!We eventually found the place, but trying to find a carpark was another thing. Building work means that car par signs are no longer correct - apparently if there is a builder about, then all signs are telling you porkie pies.

The doctor we saw was very good, explained everything and suggested that Hubby have a single dose of chemo as surgery alone only gave a 80% chance of a cure, but chemo would push this up to 98%. We were given a load of information, booklets etc which is only going to make my life worse as hubby read the side effects ( you know those ones that don't affect anyone until they read the information sheet and all of a sudden you think you have every symptom under the sun) and has already decided that he will be too tired to wash the dishes.

He has to have a kidney function test that will last all day which they can do at the local hospital, but everything else we have to travel to this centre for - treatment, monitoring for the next 5 years - better buy myself a lot of good books - traffic jams and sitting in uncomfortable chairs is all I can think about for the future now; of and losing my temper at the man flu x 2000

26th May 2009

Lounging about in pjs today as off work due to half term. Post comes and there is an appointment at a hospital 1 1/2 hour drive away. We we told that all results etc would be sent to the 'centre of excellence' for our locality but they would just verify the results and may offer suggestions. As they actually want to see hubby I got very panicked - have they seen something else that our local hospital hadn't seen????

Called the support nurse - she is going to tell the docs off at our hospital as they are supposed to say that this centre want to see everyone with the diagnosis and not just see the results.

Had to send urgent emails as I am at work on the day of the appointment and I need to arrange for that day off, more and more agro!